Growing up, my mom taught me the cute little jingle, "Find a penny, pick it up, all day long, you have good luck!" My friends got a chuckle out of it when I still did it this little ritual well into adulthood.
Looking back, I think I have consistently found pennies but it's hard to say since I wasn't really mindful about it. It seems, most people aren't that mindful about pennies, in fact, most probably don't care that much about them. My old college roommate used to throw out pennies when she would clean our dorm room. Many people leave pennies behind at the register, or see pennies as an annoyance or not worth enough to care. I am certain people do intentionally drop pennies or leave them once they have fallen out of their pockets.
I get that one cent doesn't mean much to most people, but it does to me.
I had been well into my spiritual journey for almost 4 years before it dawned on me that maybe these pennies meant something more than just luck. As I was picking up a penny reciting the jingle in my head, it occurred to me: "Wait...is this a penny from heaven??"
"Pennies from Heaven" is a pretty common concept in the spiritual world. Many people find pennies, dimes, feathers....or see lady bugs, dragon flies, or cardinals as signs from the spirit world. Mostly these signs are seen as a message from the dearly departed and bring those here on earth a sense of peace and hope.
Of course there are many ways that you can receive a sign from spirit, but let me be a good example to you: when you want to open up spiritually, sometimes you need to let go of your old way of thinking. Actually, scratch that- you DEFINITELY need to let go of your old way of thinking in order to open up! I like to say that intuition is really a process of unlearning everything I have ever learned. My pennies were a great example of this. It was time for me to let go of my old way of thinking- "Well, aren't I lucky to find a penny!" to welcome in, "Yay! A sign from spirit!"
I have always believed in signs and as I became more mindfully aware of my connection to something greater, I started to play around with being more directive in asking for signs: "Please send me a sign...and when you do, can you please hit me over the head with a two by four.. I mean, really, make it obvious!" I always ask for signs to be obvious. I do this because I know myself. I know I have a lot to unlearn, including all the logical things I know! Asking for the sign to be obvious help me quiet my doubt and skepticism.
I don't know if the thought that my pennies might be from heave struck me over the head like a two by four, but it was certainly a moment where I had to take pause and reconsider my history of penny finding.
This moment was similar to when it first occurred to me that not only was I intuitive, but it's possible that I actually can connect to dead people. In this dawning, I called back upon all the things in my life that stood out as potentially being spiritual- and tried on this new understanding to explain them. It felt kind of a like a reorganization of information that never fully had understanding. Little snip-its and circumstances that had just been left in the "Shrug. I dunno" pile now came forward for new categorization.
In short, I'd say it was an A-Ha moment!
It sounded like this:
If I am a medium.. now it makes sense why I always was drawn to watching tv programs involving the supernatural and ghosts.. and how I would watch with both curiosity, intrigue and excitement (that was, until I hit my threshold and crossed over into fear!).
If I am an intuitive, well now it makes sense why I always felt different from everyone else.. it makes sense I went into a people-helping profession.. and now it make sense why I understand people very deeply and feel connections to my clients in ways I don't think other therapists feel.
Then, I shuffled through a few decades worth of "weird" experiences with people....strangers coming forward to connect with me in a way that felt like they knew me (or maybe that I knew them)....
That moment my friend and I went to go see The Sixth Sense and were both visibly affected by it... followed by a conversation she had with me after about what she and her mother called their "gifts of discernment"...
To the roommate I had for just a month who shared with me one late evening before he moved out, how he picks up on others emotions and experiences as he rides the T to work. He said he was an "empath" ... a word I would hear again from my boyfriend at the time- the same guy that would hold his hands over my shin splints saying he is using energy to heal my injury...
And well now, the dreams.. the dreams all make sense. Those vivid dreams of people who have past on. Those dreams that leave me waking up feeling a deep sense of longing to get back into that dream... All of these once uncategorized events now have categories.. Whoah. .. and A-Ha!
And finally, if I am a medium, then it sure makes sense why being in a room full of other mediums is the place I feel most at home and feel most relaxed in!
As all this information filtered in and found its new home in the deep understanding of myself... And so now, it is not out of question that the pennies I had been finding have been a message from spirit.
Well you know what happened after I accepted this thought into my life?
I started finding pennies EVERYWHERE!
I find at least one a week up to, at times multiple in one day. Each time I go out for a walk or run I generally find some little gem just waiting for me (I like to think Spirit supports my exercise!).
What has been so fascinating to me is the ways I find them, as if spirit crafts each moment, each head turn, each event so that I find the treasure that has been placed there just for me.
I mostly find them when I am running. I am not trying to say I run so fast that seeing a penny would seem out of the question, but I AM running and I find these dirty, beat up pennies that blend in with their surroundings. I am generally looking straight ahead, and then something makes me turn my gaze and there is the penny. I love the dirty beat up ones. Its like they have traveled through layers of atmosphere, time, and space to get to me.
I have one stretch of roadway that I now call the "portal." I have found 5 or 6 pennies in the same spot, repetitively (Update- make that 7 pennies found in that same spot!). I keep meaning to research what this area of town was before it become a busy intersection. I always intentionally check the portal for pennies, but otherwise I don't feel I go out of my way looking for them. Sometimes when I realize I haven't had one in a while, I ask in my head "where's my penny" and don't you know that I usually find one moments later.
Other fascinating finds include:
Walking into the grocery store behind an older man who stops and picks up a penny in front of me. "Sheesh! That was my penny!," I said in my head.. only to see steps later, I found one that was all mine. I guess that first penny did belong to that gentleman after all. Spirit does not make mistakes!
One time, I spilled water in the backseat of my car, so that I had to go to the other side to put my bag in... as I went to the opposite side door, there was the penny..
On one training run I was doing in preparation for a half marathon, I ran the same loop over and over.. four times, I think. On my last loop, a family of 5, complete with strollers, toddler bikes and all, stepped out into the road for a walk right in front of me. I crossed to the other side of the street for just a little stretch of roadway to give the family extra room.. and there was the penny...
And then there was the time I had to scout out a spot to stretch in the crowded gym floor- only to look up during a stretch and see a penny under the machine I was next to...
One of my most exciting finds, was the time I was debating whether it would aggravate my healing leg injury to run that extra side street. I finally decide to give it a-go, only to get rewarded with a $5 bill laying squarely in the middle of the road! Well, that's a first!
So many fun stories of how the pennies find me!
I don't pick up all the money I see. I have seen change at the end of someone's driveway, and just give a nod to spirit for letting me see it.. and one time I found a dollar at CVS, and I gave into the cashier, just in case a kid had been given it as an allowance and was hoping to buy some candy with it. I sure wouldn't want to have mistaken that for mine! I still see it as a sign, I don't think spirit only speaks to me through money that looks like it doesn't belong to anyone. A sign is a sign, I don't have to take the sign home!
I used to leave the dimes and quarters behind, thinking that the pennies were the only ones meant for me. I told this to my good spiritual pal, Nicole, who rolled her eyes at me and said "Quit that, right now. Maybe spirit is giving you a raise...pick up the damn dimes!" This is how my medium friends talk to me. They are my kind of spiritual friends! They aren't all airy fairy and fluffy. They don't live life perfectly. They don't pretend they are the second coming of (fill in almighty being's name here). They are still human and they live human lives- imperfectly, I will add! They tell me I am being ridiculous, they roll their eyes at me, they sigh annoyingly, and they curse a lot- but not about my spiritual beliefs-about when I am NOT being spiritual! They love me with joking tough love and crass humor. They keep me grounded and spiritually connected all at once!
I have taken up a collection of my money from heaven. Some people ask me who I think it's being left by. I don't have a sense that it's one being. I feel that it's just a general sign of encouragement and support. I generally receive these signs by saying out loud "Yay!" or "Thank you!"
People must think I am crazy... but a happy kind of crazy! And a supported kind of crazy...
Most recently, my cat escaped from his enclosed catio at night, unbeknownst to me. I went out for my run and noticed large tufts of fur in the driveway that was unmistakably his. I ran back inside to find him sleeping on his window sill peacefully, unharmed. His catio was busted open, leaving him free to not only have roamed in our yard all night, but also giving him complete and easy access to the street! After I assured myself he was ok, I went on for my run, upset and beating myself up for what horrible scene I could have possibly come upon that morning.
On that run, I found a penny... "Ok," I thought.. "Things will be ok." And then I found a nickel... followed by another nickel.. followed by a quarter! "Ok, spirit!" I started laughing, "Ok, I get it, it's ok. I can let it go now."
So, I guess my pennies aren't really from heaven. Mine are pennies, quarters, nickels, dimes, and dollar bills of support, of guidance, of confirmation, of reassurance, of "we got you"...
Here is the dime I received on my run today thinking about posting this blog!
What kind of signs do you receive?